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The GoodLetter Thursday, October 3, 2002
GoodThings, Inc. :: Stories, actions, ideas, and greeting cards that connect us.
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Greeting Card of the Week
Stamp Connecting: Letters lift spirits...
Even in the age of e-mail, there's still nothing quite receiving a handwritten letter from a friend or loved one who cares about you. That's why the sentiment on this week's featured GoodThings greeting card really rings true.
Lift the spirits of someone you know with a GoodThings greeting card. Every card you buy and send helps broaden awareness of progressive actions and ideas around the world. (We print all our cards on recycled paper using soy ink.)
Please visit our online store today by clicking here or on any card
IT'S TIME TO GET YOUR HOLIDAY CARD ORDERS IN! If you think customized GoodThings Greeting Cards like the ones pictured above would be perfect for your non-profit organization or company -- or even your family -- to use for the holidays, send an e-mail to cards@goodthings.com and ask us about our card customization program and volume discounts.
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Click the card to see it enlarged or to order
Front (on stamp of above card):
Letters Lift Spirits
Inside (of above card):
thinking of you
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This Week's Feature
Tomorrow's Another Day
by Jen Marlowe
What impact can one summer camp in nestled in the forests of Maine have on the futures of the youth of Afghanistan? A dedicated Seeds of Peace staffer weighs both the profound challenges and the incredible opportunities.
Editor's Note: In early August, we featured a GoodLetter from Michael Wallach, in which he remembered his late father, John, founder of an extraordinary non-profit organization called Seeds of Peace (GoodLetter #99, Detox for the Spirit). We're thrilled to be able to publish a follow-up this week about the expanding work of this inspiring group. The names of the kids in the piece have been changed.
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Dear GoodLetter readers,
Qasim's face was literally plastered against the window as the bus pulled away from the Georgetown Holiday Inn. There was barely space for the tears to drop down. The fingers of his right hand moved slowly up and down in a desperate attempt to say a final goodbye to the throng of counselors and fellow campers waving and crying outside.
I was accompanying Qasim and other Afghan kids from Seeds of Peace on the bus from Washington DC to New York's Kennedy Airport.
The night before, at the boat party, Qasim had been in all his glory. Twisting, turning, throwing his arms and legs and torso into it with all his might. Dancing, as one counselor observed, like there was no tomorrow.
The camp learned of Qasim's dancing prowess the night of the Lip Sync contest. It was still early on in camp. Most of the Afghan kids, especially the girls, were still very reserved, cautious. Only one of the girls even chose to participate in her bunk's lip sync performance and she faced heavy criticism from her fellow Afghans for doing so. But Qasim broke out that night. Center stage during his bunk's song, taking everyone's focus, Qasim demonstrated moves that had the entire camp clapping and on its feet, cheering, "Qasim! Qasim!" Where he learned to dance like that, we had no idea. There was no MTV in Afghanistan during the Taliban rule.
I have very little real idea about what the 12 Afghan kids with us at camp this summer have faced in their lives or what they are facing now that they are newly returned back home to Kabul. Most of what I know comes from conversations with their facilitators, hearing snippets about the horrors that have been these kids' lives. Siblings sold so that the parents could feed the rest of the family. Burying loved ones with bare hands. Having the physique of a grown man at the age of 14 because of having been forced to perform physical labor like a donkey since who knows how long.
Early in a coexistence session, the Afghan kids were given art supplies and asked to draw a picture representing their idea of what peace would look like. Two kids chose colors for their pictures. The other ten kids drew in pencil or black marker only. Their view of the world did not include color.
The kids talked a lot about respect during their dialogue sessions. They had a very hard time showing it to each other. They would berate and even punch each other during the sessions they had in their Coexistence Hut. The reality inside the room was nothing more than a reflection of the reality outside the room. It is how they have been treated their entire lives, from family, teachers, friends.
Hamid used to whack Raz particularly often and particularly harshly. Raz was sometimes reduced to tears. "I have to teach him a lesson," Hamid would say. "He's too soft, he'll never survive like that. I have to teach him to respect me, to listen to me."
The discussions about respect, of course, occurred only when they got to the point where they could have a discussion at all. The first week or so, they could barely sit in a room and speak, let alone listen to one another. But when the talking began, it got real very fast. Could these kids, after all they've been through, have respect for themselves, let alone others?
"Maybe in the next generation." One kid said. "It's too late for ours."
The Message to Hajime is an over-100-activity relay race that closes Color Games at Seeds of Peace camp. Samira was sitting on the porch steps of the Big Hall, waiting for her turn. It was early on in the race; Samira had at least half an hour before her sprint. I sat down next to her.
"Everyone in my country is depressed, everyone is unhappy. Nobody knows how to smile or how to laugh," Samira was telling me, although I don't remember how the conversation started. "Coming to this camp…it was such a shock. Nobody is like this back home. We didn't know how to behave, what to do." My mind flashed back to conversations with their facilitators, who told me the kids had discussed in one session what their response is to the overwhelming amount of affection they receive at the camp. On the one hand, starved for it, they turn into puppies and lap it up. On the other hand, they don't know how to deal with the raw emotions that a hug invokes for them. They feel, as one participant put it, as if they are going to burst.
"I did things here I can never do back home. Girls can't play sports back home. We can't go swimming. When I get home, I am going to fight that. I am going to fight to change the situation for girls in my country."
Maybe I should have been delighted and proud that Samira had been so inspired and empowered by her experience with us. Mostly I was scared.
"Is that dangerous for you? What will happen if you speak out about these things at home?"
Samira acknowledged that it could be dangerous. "What might happen?" I tried to press her.
"My father might get very angry. He didn't want me to come here to begin with." That was as much as she was willing to reveal.
I sat on the steps of the Big Hall a few moments longer, watching Samira sprint with all her heart.
As the bus got underway for the five hour ride to the airport, we popped in some movies, starting with Happy Gilmore. The Afghan kids loved it from the start. Every time Happy got angry and started screaming at someone or pounding them, they broke into delighted whoops and giggles.
"It's just like that!" Samira told me, when Happy punched out some guy. "That's exactly how people act in my country!"
A few minutes later, Happy attacked someone else in a burst of anger. Khalil, who was sitting across the aisle, leaned over the seat, choking on his laughter. "Hey, Samira! This guy! He's an Afghan!"
It never would have occurred to me in a million years that Happy Gilmore or any of Adam Sandler's other works would be culturally relevant to teenagers from Afghanistan.
Half-way through the second movie, most of the kids dropped off to sleep. Khalil took the opportunity to show me his sketch pad. He had made a pencil portrait of a bearded man. It was really good.
"Where did you learn to draw like that?" I asked him.
"I went to a drawing school," he told me. "The school was secret; it wasn't allowed. Each time we had a lesson, one student stood outside the door to keep guard. If someone from the police came, he gave a signal, and we hid all the things to make the drawings."
What does it mean that we took them out of their homes, gave them these three weeks, and then sent them back? They were in a cave and brought into bright light, as one described it. It took a week or two for many of them to even adjust to that light, and then they go back into the cave. Their lives now -- are they richer for having seen that light? Do they have new strength, a vision for how their lives can be that will help fend off desperation and hopelessness? Or the exact opposite -- now that they have seen what else is out there, other ways of being in the world, other ways of treating people, is the darkness more unbearable than ever?
What if Samira does go out there and fight for her rights as a woman? Will she be hurt for that? If Hamid does stand up to his dad and tells him that he doesn't deserve to be treated that way? Will he be accused of being arrogant and brainwashed by that American camp and get whacked extra hard for good measure?
Time and time again, I have been nervous about the ramifications Seeds of Peace has in the lives of the kids we work with. And time and time again, the kids have proven me wrong: That my caution was excessive. That they have the grace and strength to deal with the new reality we thrust them in, painful as it is, and sometimes to even transform it, in small ways or large. That the meaning they draw from the experience outweighs almost everything else they encounter as a result.
Does that apply to our newest charges, the Afghan kids? I don't know. None of us knows. I am now in Kabul. Here, I'll see the kids and talk to them, meet with their delegation leaders, families and go to their schools. Hopefully, by the end of my month there, I will have a very clear idea about how their experience at Seeds of Peace has impacted their lives back home and what the struggles they face now are. Their struggles are of a different nature than those faced by our returning Seeds from the other regions in which we work -- of that I feel certain, but not of much else. I hope to be able to recommend what we can do to help ensure that they are strengthened, fortified, and supported as they face what they now have to face, both as Afghan youth, and as Seeds.
:: Jen Marlowe
Kabul, Afghanistan
(Thoughts on Jen's GoodLetter? Inspired by what you've read? E-mail us -- don't forget to tell us your name, where you're from, and if we can use your words in a future GoodLetter or on our Web site.)
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TALK ABOUT IT
What role can organizations like Seeds of Peace have in changing the lives of youth in embattled parts of the world? Do you know of other groups that have such an extraordinary mission? Share your stories and ideas.
LEARN MORE ABOUT IT
Seeds of Peace has graduated over 2,000 teenagers representing 22 nations from its internationally recognized conflict-resolution program since it was created in 1993. Living together throughout the summer at the Seeds of Peace International Camp in Otisfield, Maine, these teenagers, who were identified by their governments as among the best and brightest, work to develop the building blocks necessary for peaceful coexistence. The organization also provides a safe and supportive environment in which the youngsters can air their views and learn communication, listening, negotiation and other conflict-resolution techniques that allow them to develop empathy for one another. This summer, Seeds of Peace has brought together youth from the Middle East, India, Pakistan, Cyprus, the Balkans, the United States, and, for the first time, Afghanistan.
:: Seeds of Peace www.seedsofpeace.org
:: Shabana Is Late for School (uplifting New York Times magazine article on Afghan youth) [more]
:: UNICEF's humanitarian work in Afghanistan
:: Afghan Youth Council (UK)
:: Afghanistan Youth Center
:: War Child Canada's Afghan Field Diaries
:: Afghan Youth - The NEXT Generation of Afghanistan
DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT
:: Help send an Afghan teenager -- or a youth from another war-torn part of the world -- to Seeds of Peace summer camp (or support the organization in other ways)
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Good Gravy
As we told you last week, Good Gravy is moving in a direction that we think fans of our Favorite GoodThings feature will love. Each week, we'll feature a new list of Good Gravy recommendations from a GoodLetter reader or from someone here at GoodThings. So send us your own personal top-ten list (or top five) of all things entertainment related -- the books or articles you're reading, the movies you've rented or seen in the theaters, the music that you can stop listening to -- and it might end up here in our revamped Good Gravy section!
Thanks to all of you who have shared your own Good Gravy recently. Keep it coming! What's YOUR favorite Good Gravy these days? Check out what readers like you are saying -- who says GoodLetter readers don't have eclectic tastes?
1. Kara Garcia of Quezon City, Philippines, recommends:
(book) If Only It Were True, by Marc Levy (2001)
"It's a fictional story of Arthur who suddenly finds himself face-to-face with a woman who's in a coma in a hospital room across town. A very touching, funny, and light-hearted book. It looks at death and life in a different way, and probably will encourage readers to do the same thing. A really good read!"
2. Sharon Brown of St. Louis, Missouri, loves:
(film to rent) Big Bad Love (2001)
"Based on a book of short stories by southern writer, Larry Brown, it stars Arliss Howard, Debra Winger, Angie Dickinson and Paul LeMat. Entire cast is fabulous with a sweet soundtrack."
3. A reader from Waltham, Massachusetts, was surprised by:
(film) Lagaan (2002)
"Unbelievable: a four-hour Indian musical about cricket that had me laughing, crying, and totally enthralled, even though I hate subtitles, know nothing about cricket, and avoid movies with intermissions. After seeing it, we went out and bought it."
4. Susana Poulson of Almada, Portugal, suggests:
(music) I Might Be Wrong: Live Recordings, by Radiohead (2001)
"Recently, Portugal welcomed, after a long waiting period, a band our people cherish -- Radiohead. The good thing that happened was that the band chose Portugal to present its audience with a bunch of new songs. It's becoming greatly known the love with which Portugal, my country, welcomes foreign artists. The new songs are simply fabulous. The concert I went to made me feel in a way that I almost forgot I was there. Their music is just so uplifting -- it brings you up and down and makes you believe that there still are people who understand music as art at its most human."
5. A reader from Issaquah, Washington, loves positive filmmaking:
(film to rent) The Road Home (2000)
"Rated G Chinese film with English subtitles. Won a Sundance Film Festival award. Very moving story about true, committed love. Everyone who sees it says it is truly a 'good' movie."
6. JC from Carmel Valley, California, has got it bad for sweet soul music:
(music) Feeling Orange But Sometimes Blue, by Ledisi (2002)
"I happened upon Ledisi in San Francisco. The singer (accompanied by bass and drums) is just phenomenal. She could go up against Mahalia Jackson, Lena Horne, Aretha (yes, the Queen), and those young pop divas, too. Such vocal range and such a wide variety of styles (can she scat!). Her two CDs are an eclectic combination of jazz, blues, gospel, pop, rock. And most all of the tunes are uplifting, my favorite being "Stop Livin' In Yo' Head." I can't get the CDs out of my stereo."
7. Dorothy Broom of Canberra, Australia, recommends a wonderful memoir:
(book) Once Upon A Town: The Miracle of the North Platte Canteen, by Bob Greene (2002)
"The book is about the North Platte, Nebraska Canteen which functioned during World War II to give food and friendship to soldiers and sailors traveling through on troop trains. Volunteers served around 6 million service personnel, greeting up to 20 trains per day, 24 hours per day on brief stops."
8. Rose Marie Smith of Atlanta, Missouri, has a great acoustic music tip:
(music) The Storm Still Rages, by Rhonda Vincent (2001)
"My favorite current bluegrass singer is Rhonda Vincent, a hometown girl from northeast Missouri. She rates right up there with Alison Krauss in my estimation."
9. Stefaan Demey of Belgium loves the ultimate Russian science fiction movie:
(film to rent) Solaris (1979)
"Andrej Tarkovsky's original is the best science fiction I ever saw." (American filmmaker Steven Soderbergh's remake of this classic is due in theaters this fall.)
10. Jim Kane of Rochester, New York, made a great radio discovery on the Web:
(radio) Grassy Hill Radio
"Grassy Hill Radio is the baby of Tom Neff, a stellar citizen of the acoustic music community. He hosts a regular series of concerts in a purpose-built "performance barn" (can you imagine?) in Lyme, Connecticut -- and the best streaming radio station on the Net. Great music from an interesting procession of performers and good audio quality."
Talk to us: What do you think of the new Good Gravy format? Share your top ten. What's YOUR Good Gravy? Let's start sharing good entertainment finds with each other! Send us your list of what you're reading, watching, or listening to and let us know why you think it's good. Your Good Gravy could be featured here next week.
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